Our hearts are so heavy this morning. Our warrior babies, Amelia and Noah, have made their final journey across the Rainbow Bridge and our hearts are hurting.
We want to say thank you to Dr Kate at Primary Care Animal Hospital for handling their medical care so carefully, to Stefanie Camarena ( @torrance.fosters ) for networking them to help raise funds for them, to every single person who supported them on their journey, and especially to their foster family(one of our founders) who dedicated so much love and care to these babies.
Their foster mom writes:
“The worst feeling in the world is doing your absolute best and it's still not enough.
Both Amelia and Noah crossed the rainbow bridge last night and I hope they are free and in no pain now.
Noah and Amelia went to see Dr Kate last night because Amelia was having a reaction to dewormer.. Noah was doing fine, but went anyway for a recheck. She told us they look great and she was very excited about the progress they've made with their eyes and their infection had gone way down for both of them. She wasn't worried about them not surviving. They weren't dehydrated, active, and alert. She told us to keep doing what we're doing and that the vet visit wasn't even necessary because “you take such good care of them. You know what to do. You'd do the same thing I'd do here but better because of the one-on-one attention”.
Amelia hasn't been well for 2 days since she received her dewormer and within hours of seeing the vet, her body just failed her and as much as we tried to save her, we couldn't pull her back. She passed away at 12:56 am.
I was exhausted and heartbroken. So I tucked Noah into bed, gave him a kiss and went to sleep. He was fine. Eating great. Active and so so sweet. As I laid down, he got up to eat.
I wake up at 3:45 am from pain(happens all the time) and did my usual check in on my babies only to find that Noah had passed in his sleep unexpectedly and without warning. He didn't struggle. He didn't suffer. He was literally curled up like he was sleeping, but he didn't react when I said his name which was weird to me because he would always jump at the sound of my voice.
I am in shock. I am utterly and completely heartbroken. I poured my heart and soul into saving these babies and I lost them both in one night. I can't wrap my head around this. I am angry at myself for not saving them from that wicked person sooner. I am angry at the woman who watched and allowed them to suffer while their eyes literally exploded in front of her. I am confused with their passing. But mostly... I feel completely defeated.
I have not cried this much with the loss of a baby since I lost my Owen. Noah and Amelia were so special to me, and to everyone, and I feel like I failed them and I failed all of you.
I did my very best from the very beginning and it still wasn't enough. I stayed up with them countless nights just because they wanted to cuddle and it wasn't enough. I gave them endless amount of love and it wasn't enough. All the best foods a kitten could get - hell, the best of everything just for them - and it wasn't enough. I loved them with all my heart and it wasn't enough. I wasn't enough for them and I'm sorry.
My Noah and Amelia, I hope you are up there somewhere with my Zeus, Aries, and Owen saving a spot just for me to be reunited with my babies. I hope you are free of pain and running with my boys happy and healthy as can be. I hope you know you were, still are, and forever will be loved. If love was enough to save you, you both would have lived forever.”
The loss of these babies is very difficult for us as a team as it was so sudden and we could all use your love through this.
We will remember and honor Noah and Amelia in everything we do.
August 10, 2018